#MessyJussie Lawd lawd lawd…Jussie Smollett done used a CHECK to pay those two Nigerians hunks to fake-hate-crime his dumb ass. Cookie Lyon – come get yo son!
#TittyTwins Tamera Mowry is “sick” (with what, she’s not saying) but she’s not just doing the regular old doctor/medicine/rest thing because celebrities are not like me and you. Instead, she’s drinking her twin sister’s breastmilk. So…mmmkay. Well, I got nothing. Feel better, Tam!
#NoMoDrama Mary J.Blige is done messing around with no-good mooches. She says she’s single and happy and done taking care of men.
#WriteOff Jussie Smollett won’t be on the last episodes of Empire this season, and it’s rumored they may be considering writing his character off for good. This is obviously not what he had in mind when he fake-hate-crimed himself for a raise. In fact, he’s so dumb he might not realize that this is the exact opposite of what he was trying to do.
#WeWillNeverBeFree The next generation of Kardashians is already tyrannizing America. Kim and Kanye’s klone North West krashed the kover of some magazine that couldn’t help but wax poetic about how her “distinct fashion sense belies her age”. Bitch, she’s FIVE! And she’s a member of the most produced, managed, branded family on the planet. She doesn’t choose ANYTHING for herself. Please.
#OoohGirl Since this week’s #Rehash has already covered sloppy messes like Jussie Smollett and Kardashians, let’s combine the two for our next hashtag cuz this is just too juicy to ignore. Apparently Kylie Jenner’s BFF (and housemate…or former, now) Jordyn Woods slept with Khloe Kardashian’s cheating baby-daddy Tristan Thompson and can someone please get me a fresh teabag for my cup??? I have so much sipping to do.
#JeopardySuccession Jeopardy host Alex Trebek says he thinks Betty White should replace him once he retires as host of the long-running quiz show. Y’all, Betty White has to live forever. She’s booked until at least through 2132.
#RoyalShower British royalty find baby showers gauche, so Meghan Markle flew all the way to New York to attend a shower hosted by Serena Williams.
#RIP Peter Tork of The Monkees has passed away at the age of 77.
#QueerAsMiley Miley Cyrus vomited up some words about being a “queer” woman in a heterosexual marriage to lesser Hemsworth Liam (all hail Chris!).
#Finally R.Kelly was charged with 10 counts of sexual abuse. Tough week for Chicago celebrities. Byeee, bitch.
Just kidding....Kira is a writer, actor and suburban housewife and mother. Her mantra is "If I can't do it from the couch, is it really worth it?"
- The Weekly #Rehash: Jussie Smollett Is a Sloppy Mess Edition - February 22, 2019
- The Weekly #Rehash: GOOP is Heading to Netflix Edition - February 8, 2019
- The Weekly #Rehash: Bryan Singer Must Know ALL THE TEA Edition - January 25, 2019
